


Attachment

by destiels (epiphavny)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive John Winchester, Angst, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, First Love, Fluff, Gay Castiel (Supernatural), Homophobic John Winchester, M/M, Past Abuse, Teen Castiel (Supernatural), Teen Dean Winchester, Young Castiel/Young Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-19 18:28:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14243226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epiphavny/pseuds/destiels
Summary: With John hunting the thing that killed Mary, they never stay in one place. So Dean always tries his best to not get attached to anything, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't help but get attached to Castiel.





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**Author's Note:**

> Dean Winchester is sixteen and Castiel is a seventeen year old human.

Dean smiled at Sam who was running around the park giggling to himself. Dean saw the Impala drive up and frowned slightly walking up to the window John was rolling down. "Get Sam, we're going." Dean nodded and walked back to the park, knocking on the slide to get Sam's attention "Come on, bud." Sam frowned and made his way to the Impala with Dean.

Dean opened up the door for Sam and got in the front. "Where are we going, dad?" Sam asked as he shut the door and got comfy. "We're going away, Sammy." Dean saw the frown on Sam's face in the mirror but didn't want to disappoint his dad "You should know by now that we don't stay in one place, Sam. Remember that." Dean said with a deep tone "Dean is right, Sam." Sam murmured an "okay" and looked out of the window as they drove.

"Okay Dean, remember what I've taught you." John said as he opened up the back of the Impala "Shoot first, ask questions later and watch out for Sammy." "I know, sir." John placed the gun in Dean's hands and shut the Impala. Dean watched the Impala drive away and God knows when it will be back. Sometimes it would take days but sometimes it would take weeks.

A day had passed since John left Sam and Dean in the motel. They had went grocery shopping but Sam had already eaten all of the food and was getting cranky. Dean even gave him the whole pie he had bought for himself because he didn't want Sam to be starving. John didn't leave that much money and Sam was saying he was hungry again.

"Okay, Sammy. I'll go get us some food okay?" Dean turned on the TV and the first thing that popped up was Scooby Doo. Dean smiled but looking at Fred brought back bad memories that would include John screaming at him. "I'll be back soon." Dean said and ruffled Sam's hair before leaving.

Dean walked inside the store and made his way to the food aisle. He grabbed a box of cookies, some drinks and a little action figure for Sam. He stuffed the inside of his jacket with the food and carefully so that the cashier wouldn't notice. He got his phone out of his pocket and pretended to have an argument with someone as he made his way out of the store. He quickly walked in an alleyway and exhaled.

"Shoplifting huh?" He heard a voice and quickly turned around. Dean's eyes widened in panic "It's-I wasn't-" "Calm down, I wont say anything." The boy said and walked up to Dean. "I'm Castiel" He said and held out his hand "I'm Dean" he said and shook Castiel's hand. "So why are you shoplifting anyway?" Castiel asked and rested himself against the wall. "It's for my little brother. I don't want him to starve." Dean said but heard his own stomach rumble. Castiel looked at him with pity "Looks like you're the one starving." Dean didn't say anything.

A minute of silence had passed and Castiel sighed "Okay, wait here for a second." Castiel said and walked inside the store. Dean didn't kniw whether to run or stay. Castiel could be anything. A vampire, werewolf, anything away. However Dean didn't get that vibe from Castiel. Castiel seemed nice. Some minutes later and Castiel walked out with a bag of groceries and gave it to Dean.

"No, I can't accept that. We're not homeless or anything." Dean said but Castiel grabbed Dean's hand and insisted anyway "If you're not homeless then whatever, keep it anyway. I didn't know where to spend that money anyway." Dean looked at Castiel with confusion in his eyes. No one has ever been this nice to him other than his mother. Especially someone he had just met.

"Listen I have to get going, but thank you so much." Dean said and Castiel smiled softly and nodded. Dean started walking but stopped, he looked behind him to see Castiel still there. "Are you..homeless?" Dean asked and Castiel looked up at him and laughed "No, it's just my parents are arguing again and I'm not up to hearing it right now." "How about you come with me?" Dean said _'inviting someone you barely know to where you and your little brother are staying? real smart, dean.'_ Dean thought to himself. "Really? What will your brother think?" Castiel asked as he walked up to Dean "I'll come up with something."

"Sammy?" Dean asked as he opened up the door and immediately felt two arms wrap around him. "Woah, woah, buddy!" Dean said and laughed as he hugged Sam back. "Did you get us some food?" Sam asked and pulled away from the hug. Sam noticed the boy behind Dean "Oh, this is Castiel. He's gonna stay with us for the night. It's okay he's nice." _'yeah you barely know him'_ Dean thought to himself. Castiel smiled at Sam and waved at him. Sam smiled back and crawled back onto his bed.Dean leaned into Castiel "Do anything sketchy and I will kill you" He whispered and Castiel just nodded.

Sam was already asleep and Dean sat down at the table Castiel was sitting at. "Okay if I'm gonna let you stay here then you need to tell me more about you." Dean said looking at Castiel. "My parents are pretty religious hence my name Castiel. I'm an only child, I go to a private school but my mother wanted me to go to a christian school, i like bees, my hobby is drawing, i have a good relationship with my parents and i don't really know what else to tell you" Castiel said looking at the moon through the window. Dean studied Castiel's face not being able to take his eyes off it. Castiel made eye contact with Dean and he quickly looked away.

"Well, I guess you can stay but if you have a good relationship with your parents why are they arguing?" Dean asked "They don't have a good relationship with each other. I just don't want to be in the middle of it, that's all." Dean nodded slowly. "My mom was an amazing person but ever since she died my dad has changed so much. Hell, I'm sometimes scared of him." Dean looked down not really knowing where to look. Dean felt a hand on his and slowly looked up at Castiel

"May your mother rest in peace. He's probably still grieving. It takes a while to heal from such a loss." Castiel said quietly. His voice deep, smooth, calm and just so pleasing to hear. Dean was starting to get flustered thinking about such things and quickly got up and coughed. "I think there's some spare bed sheets and pillows in the bathroom. You can sleep here on the floor." Dean said and Castiel nodded mouthing a 'thank you'. Dean laid down under the covers of the bed and listened as Castiel wrapped himself up in the covers.

Morning came and Dean opened up his eyes to see Castiel no where in sight. Dean quickly sat up but noticed a note on the nightstand. "Hey, it's Castiel. I left early because I didn't want to make it weird for your little brother. I didn't do anything _'sketchy'_ so you don't need to worry about killing me. I appreciate what you did for me and I think you're a pretty good guy. If you want to meet up again, I'll be at the church right across the road from the store you shoplifted yesterday :) bye!" Dean laughed at the smiley face and put the note back on the nightstand.

"Hey, Sammy" Dean started while they both sat at the table eating "Yes, Dean?" Sam asked, his mouth full of tiny sandwiches "I was thinking I would meet up with Castiel again, but I don't want to leave you alone." Dean said and Sam stopped eating, looking at Dean with a serious look on his face "Is Castiel your friend? You said it yourself to not get attached to anything to the places we go to!" Sam said and Dean sat quietly knowing Sam is right and that they will be leaving soon. "I'm not attached to him. I just-" "You just what? You'll be leaving soon and will never see him again. It's not worth it. You're gonna get hurt." Sam said and walked away from the table to his bed. Dean just sat quietly taking the words Sam said in "But you can go. I'll be okay."

Dean looked at the church in front of him. He's never believed in a God or really anything related to God. With all of the monsters out in the world it's hard to believe that there is a God. He made is way in the church to see Castiel in the front. Dean sat down next to Castiel and he smiled seeing that Dean had came to see him. "I didn't think you'd come." Castiel said "I didn't either" Dean whispered as he looked around the church "I don't know why but I've always felt a strong energy in this church." Castiel said trying to keep conversation. Dean didn't really know what to say "Do you think Heaven is real?" Dean asked and Castiel looked through the window "Yes, actually. Do you?" Castiel asked back "No, I don't really believe in anything related to God" Dean replied but since he has hunted a few demons before, that would mean there is a hell, and if there's a hell there must be a heaven.

"How about we go biking?" Castiel asked as they both walked out of the church "I don't have a bike." Dean said and Castiel laughed "I don't either but.." Castiel pointed at the bike across the street. Dean looked at Castiel and then at the bike and back at Castiel "Wait, you want to steal a bike?" Dean asked and Castiel nodded trying to hide a laugh. Castiel grabbed Dean's hand and started to drag him towards the bike "Not technically stealing, just borrowing," Castiel said and jumped on the bike "Come on, let's go!" Dean sat behind Castiel and they drove off laughing.

"There's this one place I wanted to show you." Castiel said and slowed down the bike. Dean looked to his right to see a huge sea. Castiel dropped the bike and motioned for Dean to follow him. Dean followed Castiel down the steep little hill that led to the sea. The sun was setting already, making the water a bit orange and very beautiful. Dean was caught off guard to see Castiel taking his jacket and shirt off "Uhm, what the hell are you doing?" Dean asked but couldn't take his eyes off the boy in front of him. "Going for a swim, wanna join?" Castiel asked as he undid his belt, Dean couldn't take his eyes off of Castiel's body, he looked so perfect in the sunlight and just in general. "Cas, come on. You're insane." Dean said but Castiel had already just dove into the water.

Castiel swam back up and laughed "It's cold but so refreshing! Get in here!" Castiel shouted swimming on his back "No thanks, I'm good over here!" Dean replied and Castiel groaned and swam a bit closer to Dean "What, you're scared of a little bit of water?" Castiel asked as he splashed some water on Dean "Hey, not cool!" Dean shouted and walked further back "Come on, Dean! I stole a bike for you-for us!" Castiel stuttered on his words and Dean sighed. "Fine," Castiel shoved his fist up in the air with happiness and Dean rolled his eyes "But only for ten minutes or less." Dean said but as he lifted his shirt he could feel himself getting self-conscious. He's never been like this with girls around, it was quite the opposite, throwing his shirt off on the ground and wink at the girls around him, but there weren't any girls around and the only person who could see him was the boy he met two days ago.

Dean froze for a moment but quickly snapped back into reality to not seem off. Castiel smirked slightly, admiring the boy in front of him. Dean took off his pants and folded them, putting them on a rock carefully. He walked over to the water and stepped in and took a deep breath "How do you expect me to get in that?!" Dean asked shivering slightly. Cas smirked more and got up walking toward Dean "Like this." Castiel hugged Dean from behind and started walking backwards, deeper in the water. Dean was shouting something at Castiel but Castiel only laughed in response. Castiel let go of Dean and Dean slowly turned to Castiel with a death glare.

"What is wrong with you!" Deans shouted and tackled Castiel into the water. They both just looked at each other under the water, of course Castiel took this as a opportunity to see who could hold their breath the longest. After some seconds Dean swam back up but Castiel stayed under. Castiel started to swim around Dean like a shark around it's prey. "Okay, fine you win. You can stop drowning yourself n-" He was cut off by Castiel swimming up way too close to him. "You could barely hold your breath!" Castiel said, not backing away. There was a moment of silence between the two, only them looking at each other with smiles on their faces, Castiel glancing at Dean's lips from time to time. Dean noticed that and started to get nervous, he has never had any sexual contact with a boy before. Dean just laughed and turned around, diving into the water to have a little break.

Dean and Castiel have been swimming around for more than forty minutes now, they had lost track of time. Castiel splashed the water on Dean's face and Dean splashed back, both of them dying of laughter. Castiel noticed how Dean's lips had gotten slightly blue and calmed down "Hey, how about we get out of the water for a bit." Castiel suggested and Dean nodded, both of them walking to the shore. They both sat down on a big rock and breathed heavily, tired of swimming around all the time. "Haven't laughed this hard in a long time." Dean said, smiling softly as he looked at the water that was sparkling from the moonlight.

Castiel looked at Dean and smiled "I'm glad that I've made you laugh. My friends would never agree to this, unlike someone I just basically met, but I have had more fun with you then with any of my friends. They've been ignoring me for some time now anyway." Castiel said and looked at the ground, picking up a small rock and playing around with it. Dean wanted to ask why but didn't want to bring up a touchy subject. "I don't know why but I feel so drawn to you. I wouldn't just let anyone come with me to where me and my brother are staying and offer them to stay the night." Dean said and glanced down at Castiel's hand that was not that far away from his.

Castiel started talking to Dean about how nice he has been to him, but Dean only focused on Castiel's hand. Dean slowly inched his hand over to Castiel's hand and held it gently, cutting Castiel off his sentence. Castiel looked down at their hands, a few seconds went by and Dean was considering just making a run for it, but Castiel held Dean's hand and rubbed his thumb slowly over it. Dean's heart felt as if it was ready to jump out of his chest.

Dean kept glancing at Castiel's lips until he couldn't take his eyes off of them, he did something he didn't expect he'd be the one to do. Dean leaned into the kiss, putting one of his hands in Castiel's hair. Castiel pulled Dean closer, the kiss started slow but Dean needed more. Castiel licked Dean's bottom lip in between kisses, Dean happily opening his mouth slightly to let Castiel's tongue in. Dean would be lying if he said he wasn't enjoying every second of this.

Dean quickly pulled away, panting like he had just ran a marathon. They both were out of words and just sat there quietly, Dean heard Castiel laugh "What?" He choked out, still out of breath "Your lips are amazing." Castiel said and Dean lightly punched Castiel's shoulder making him whisper a little 'ow'. Dean noticed how he couldn't stop smiling, he was so happy. It got a bit quiet until Dean said "I think I'm bisexual" he whispered, it felt so good to say that. He knew he always liked girls but he always felt like he liked boys just as much as girls. Castiel smiled softly "Well, I'm gay and I'm very gay for you." Castiel laughed and already knew the punch was coming, so he grabbed Dean's hand and held it with a big smile on his face. Castiel kissed Dean's hand and let it go making Dean smile even more.

They just sat there, Dean eventually resting his head on Castiel's shoulder and Castiel's arms holding Dean close. Castiel looked at Dean and kissed his forehead "Today was amazing" He whispered and Castiel's voice let alone made Dean smile "Your voice is so hot and so calming" Dean whispered but then noticed he had said that out loud and froze. Castiel smirked and leaned close to Dean's ear whispering "You're very hot too" Making his eyes widen and Dean felt his cheeks heat up. Castiel chuckled and let go of Dean, standing up. "It's getting pretty dark, you should go" Castiel said and Dean nodded.

They were dressed and Dean was getting ready to leave but stopped himself and turned around to look at Castiel. He made his way toward Castiel and kissed him softly. Castiel smiled and pressed his forehead to Dean's "Sure I can't give you a ride?" Castiel asked and Dean nodded "The person you _borrowed_ that bike from would be happy to see it back and I can walk." Dean said as he started walking slowly "Okay, have a good night" Castiel said and Dean smiled "You too."

Dean arrived at the motel but froze to see the Impala parked. He whispered 'fuck' under his breath and started running to the room. He opened the door to see John Winchester pressed up against a wall with his arms crossed, looking disappointed. Dean looked at Sam who was playing with legos on the bed. "Dean, do you mind if we go outside? I need to talk to you." John said and Dean nodded already going back outside.

John shut the door and turned to Dean "I come back and what do I see? Your little brother, all by himself in a motel room." John said, Dean could tell he was trying his best to remain calm "Dad, Sammy said it was alrigh-" Dean was cut off by John grabbing his wrist and dragging him to the other side of the motel, where no one could see them "You didn't even salt the goddamn rooms!" John said, raising his voice a bit and putting his hand on Dean's other wrist "Dad, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to put him in danger." "You're sorry?You don't get to be sorry! I've told you so many times to look out for your brother!" John yelled, tightening his grip on Dean's wrists "Sam said you invited some boy over too." John said lowering his voice a bit "Who the hell was he?" John asked "A friend. His name is Castiel." Dean replied and John shook his head slowly "So you're telling me..You invited a stranger in the room, where your brother is staying, and you left Sam alone today to go out with him too didn't you?" Dean didn't reply "Didn't you?!" John rasied his voice and tightened his grip on Dean's wrists more. Dean nodded trying not to act on the pain or show any emotion "What did you do with him, huh?" John asked and Dean stayed quiet for a little, trying to find the right words.

John noticed Dean's lips had gotten a bit more swollen and red. Then it hit him, John looked at Dean in complete disgust "You kissed that boy didn't you?" John asked and Dean looked up at him "Dad-" "Did you kiss that boy, Dean." John said calmly but tightened his grip even more on Dean's wrists, probably leaving bruises "Dad, pl-" "Did you?!" John raised his voice again "Dad, you're hurting me." Dean whispered as his eyes slowly filled up with tears, the pain getting too much. "It's about to get worse if you don't tell the goddamn truth!" John yelled and squeezed Dean's wrists even tighter making Dean scream "YES!" and started crying. John let go of Dean's wrists and backed away a little bit.

"You're a disappointment. You disgust me, all the things you have done while I have been gone..You're a real and utter disappointment, Dean Winchester." John said and Dean continued to cry "We're leaving tomorrow night." John said and walked back to the motel room, leaving Dean there. It's like Dean couldn't move, His wrists were in so much pain and the things John just said didn't make it any better. Dean started to feel ashamed of what he did, he was starting to become disgusted with himself, John's words really working their way into his brain.

Dean woke up in his bed and looked out the window, the impala was gone so John had probably left again. Dean turned around to see Sam watching TV again. "Good morning" Dean whispered as he wiped his eyes and Sam smiled at Dean but his smiled faded and he pointed at Dean's wrists "What happened?" Sam asked. Dean looked at the bruises and hid them quickly "Oh, it's okay! I just fell, that's all." Dean said smiling and Sam still looked concerned but nodded.

As Dean was eating breakfast he heard someone knocking on the door. He got up and opened up the door to see Castiel. Dean looked at Sam and walked outside shutting the door "What do you want?" Dean asked and Castiel furrowed his eyebrows "I wanted to see you, what's with the attitude?" Castiel asked "Well, I don't want to see you, so get the fuck away from me." Dean said and was about to open the door but Castiel grabbed his hand making him stop "What's wrong, Dean?" Dean shut his eyes tightly and stood there quietly.

Dean was about to pull his hand away but heard a gasp. "Who did that to you?" Castiel asked with concern and anger in his voice. Dean froze and wanted to cling onto Castiel so badly but held back. A few seconds passed and Dean rushed back inside the motel room. It was quiet but he heard Castiel step closer to the door "Okay, you don't want to talk to me. I understand, but 5pm at our place if you make up your mind." And with that Castiel left. Dean just stood there against the door, so many emotions at once went through him.

Dean looked at the clock and it was 5pm. He looked at Sam and back at the clock. He quickly put on his jacket and ran over to Sam "Listen to me, buddy. I'll be back. Please tell Dad I went out for food, okay?" Dean said and ran out the door hearing Sam say "Okay". He was running so fast he felt as if he was gonna pass out any second but he had to get there. It's his last day here. He has to see Castiel one last time.

He reached the place and ran down that little hill to see Castiel sitting on the rock they kissed on. He sighed in relief and slowly walked up to him. Castiel looked at Dean and scooted so that he would have some space on the rock. Dean sat down next to him and looked down at the ground "I'm leaving tonight." He said, might as well get to the point. Castiel looked at Dean in confusion "What?" He asked and Dean couldn't look at Castiel "My dad. He found out about us." Dean said and Castiel just looked at Dean waiting for him to explain "How did he find out?" Castiel asked and Dean laughed slightly "He didn't really find out." He paused and rolled up his sleeves, showing the bruises, Castiel covered his mouth with one of his hands in shock as he understood what happened "I told him." Dean asked and looked at Castiel.

Castiel quickly clung onto Dean, hugging him tightly "Oh my god, Dean. I'm so so sorry." Castiel said and Dean smiled softly as he hugged Castiel back. Dean let go and Dean looked back down at the ground "Worst part is... I started to feel ashamed of myself. Ashamed of what we did." Dean said and looked back at Castiel and leaned in a bit closer "But I know that what I felt yesterday...It was real and I was happy. It felt right." Dean said and leaned in to kiss Castiel. He slowly pulled away and smiled. "These past few days with you made me realize who I really am." Dean started and he felt his eyes starting to water "And this might be a bit too fast but this is my last day so what's there to lose?" Castiel looked at Dean, he himself starting to tear up at seeing Dean in so much pain.

"I love you." Dean said as his voice cracked and a tear rolled down his cheek. Dean laughed with a smile on his face and Castiel looked at Dean with such a genuine smile "I love you, Castiel!" Dean said again as he cried and Castiel just cupped Dean's face "It's not too fast because I've fallen in love with you too." He said as he felt some tears run down his cheek as well. They both looked at each other and Castiel kissed Dean. "You've made me so happy in the past few days, Castiel. So so happy." Dean said in between kisses. Castiel pulled away and wiped Dean's tears with his thumb.

It got quiet and Dean took a shaky breath "It's my fault. My dad and brother never stay in one place. I should've known better. Now look at me. I'm so attached to you and it's my own fault. My fault that we're in pain right now." Dean said breaking eye contact but Castiel whispered a bunch of no's "No, Dean look at me." Dean looked at Castiel "It's not your fault. I should've never approached you in that alleyway but you know what? I'm happy that I did." Castiel said making Dean smile.

Dean just laid there in Castiel's arms. Wishing he could stay in them forever. Dean checked his watch and he couldn't believe it was already 7pm. "I think it's time" Dean said and Castiel frowned watching Dean get up. Dean didn't move, he just stood there, his hands shaking. Castiel felt himself shaking too, he didn't want Dean to leave. Not so soon. Dean looked at Castiel and really took in the fact that he won't ever see him again. Due to the job, having close people is not a good thing in the first place, so at least Dean was protecting him but it still hurt.

Dean couldn't hold it in anymore "I don't want to leave you." He said as he hugged Castiel tightly and sobbed into his shoulder. Castiel hugged Dean back "I'm gonna miss you so much, Dean." Castiel whispered. It felt as if they were hugging forever. Sadly Dean really did have to go, John could already be there. Dean let go and held both of Castiel's hands. Both of them smiling at each other, both of their cheeks hurting from smiling so much. "Thank you so much." Dean said, still shaking and Castiel nodded. Castiel leaned in and kissed Dean softly and whispered

"Goodbye, Dean."

"Goodbye, Castiel."

They said their goodbyes and just like that, all the time they spent together was gone.

Dean arrived at the motel and saw the Impala drive in so he wasn't late and Sam didnt have to lie for Dean. Sam had just walked outside the room with his bags and John got out of the car to help Sam loud everything in. Dean walked up to Sam and smiled, ruffling his hair "Let's get back on the road, buddy?" Dean asked "Yeah, I hope we get to a place with another good TV!" Sam said and got in the backseat, making Dean smile.

John hadn't said anything to Dean but he wasn't in the mood to talk to him anyway. They drove off and Dean looked out the window, passing the church and the shop where he and Castiel met. He might not have Castiel but he at least has him in his memories. So Dean can smile about the good times they spent together. Even if that means that he can't create any new memories with the boy he claimed to be in love with.

Dean might not believe in God or anything like that but Castiel was _his_ angel.


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